The Truth is What is Useful, Part 37

My grandmother, Joy, is 93 ⅔. (I think when you pass 90 your age should be calculated like when you are under the age of ten.) She is sometimes lucid, and will tell you detailed stories about things that happened a very long time ago, and sometimes she does not know exactly who I am. This time of her life is teaching ... More


I have a problem with authority. I have always thought the problem was that I didn’t like it. But actually, the problem is that I have always assumed that authority comes from the outside. And that assumption has made me feel like someone has a giant thumb on me, holding me down. I have recently come to conclusion that, in ... More


I had the pleasure of guest-blogging over at my friend’s Big Blog Hullaballoo. The subject for her guest-blogs this summer is Interconnected. You can read my piece on boundaries here at Thanks! More

Just because we can…

I think we are jumping the shark in the scientific world on many levels nowadays.  For example, it's possible to put a fetus in a sixty-year-old uterus.  But that doesn't mean we should.  We have gone way past what is helpful and ventured too far into ludicrous. I see this issue in the cancer world a lot.  Recently ... More

Survivorship – Day 14! Some ramblings…

I think I'm hanging out in denial land a little bit lately. Certainly I keep thinking that I can continue my normal level of activity, despite the fact that the wave of exhaustion that has swept over me the past few months, especially the last month, has shown me time and again that I need to do less. I'm having a hard time ... More

Survivorship – Day 10

It was recently pointed out to me that some people are scared to talk to me because they think they'll say the wrong thing. And some people that do talk say something that isn't quite as helpful as they might be thinking it is. I'm sure it's pretty freaking hard to figure out what to say when your daughter/friend/mom/lover or ... More

Survivorship – Day 8

Saw the breast surgeon today to get MRI results and find out what's next. The good news is that I have no lumps in my right breast or lymph nodes on the right. The news I didn't love is that the lymph node on the left that is really enlarged is abutting a vein and she said I need chemo first before surgery. (All this talk of ... More

Survivorship – Day 7

Last Monday I was diagnosed with breast cancer. By the time I was in the doctor's office, six days after my biopsies, wearing that stupid cotton poncho with the snaps up the front I knew she was going to say those words. I don't think I even flinched when I heard them, or when she said that the lymph nodes also contained cancer ... More

My Retirement from World Domination

I grew up into a fine enabler. My dad's an addict, my mom's an addict, some step-parents have been addicts, three of my four grandparents were addicts and loads of other people in my family struggle with various addiction problems. The rest of us are expert enablers. I learned a long time ago how to curb the enabling with ... More

Does Size Matter?

I was trying on clothes this weekend, experiencing the age-old problem of the GIANT discrepancy in sizes by different manufacturers. The first thing I tried on was a medium, and it was too small. So immediately I did what most women do when clothes are too small, which is berate ourselves mercilessly. Then I tried on a skirt ... More