Joy in Hell

I’ve been to hell.
Dante was right;
There are many levels.

“I think it’s cancer.”
Positive for malignancy.
Poison in your veins.
Hair gone.
Can’t get out of bed for days.
Breast amputation.
Getting your arm taped down
one piece of tape at a time
because you can’t raise it over your head.
Radiation burning your flesh.
Recurrence.
More radiation.
More surgery.
More scans.
More appointments.
More medicine.
All layers of hell.

But in all of them
joy is also present.
In a friend who makes you laugh,
a nurse that gives you a hug;
a tree blooming outside the bedroom window;
a bouquet from a loved one;
a funny card sent the old-fashioned way;
children running into the room
professing love with hugs and kisses.

The beautiful lotus flower
blooms up from the muck;
Joy grows even in hell.

3 Replies to "Joy in Hell"

  • comment-avatar
    Gwyn Michael
    May 5, 2012 (2:53 pm)

    So beautiful and so true Brandie! I walk with you through the layers. I rise with you from the muck. XO

  • comment-avatar
    Emma
    May 5, 2012 (5:56 pm)

    So well-expressed. Thanks for sharing it.

  • comment-avatar
    Aunt Patty
    May 9, 2012 (3:03 am)

    You ARE what I grew up with… although much more sophysticated. You are strong and brave and loved so much. If the needles hurt, don’t do it. If the nurses are mean, gently tle them know, if friends are there for you, just let them love on you. I hurt for what you have been through. I have seen it, lived it as a child and wish I had behaved better and understood the significance of each day. You are God’s precious child… always loved and cared for. I love you.

    Aunt Patty